newyorkette

There’s nothing like selling a clichéed cartoon image with a fresh, unheard-of caption! That’s a cartoonist’s favorite pastime!
This attempt was rejected this week. (Another cartoon was bought, so I don’t feel too bad.) Perhaps my caption was not as unheard of as I’d hoped! (sigh!) It will be resubmitted with another caption someday, have no doubt. I’m very proud of my cows! Ive never drawn cows before!

(A mannequin is helpful, but a real live person, like me, is better!

I have a second life as a mannequin. A living, breathing mannequin called a “fit model.” It’s a fun job most of the time, because it not only relies on my bodily measurements, but on my technical knowledge of patternmaking as well. My “day job” is helping technical designers make sure that a designer’s clothes fit right for who they’re designed for. I’m a size 6, but we fit models come in all shapes and sizes, from petite to 18W, even including kids and pregnant women.

So you see, there’s a fit model out there for everyone! (And contrary to what some people seem to think, one size fit model does not think she’s better than another size fit model — we’re all perfect for our size, which is why we get the big bucks! Get over your preconceptions, skinny-biased ladies!)

Anyway, the other day I received an endorsement from Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi! An indirect one: I was told that one of the shirts I fit for a friend was purchased by her in every color! So, I guess I did my job right!

If you want to know what women are really fighting these days, have a look at the idealized body in this Prada animation. (This is not what a fit model looks like at all.)

Too bad I can’t use that $300 President Bush is trying to tuck into my bra to go buy something useful, like some brains for him! I will definitely be giving it to charity, even if it means eating rice and beans for a month. I cook a pretty mean rice n’ beans, anyway. Mmmm! I can’t wait!

Just like Mick Stevens, I’ve got my rejected Christmas cartoon dregs. This one is about the dregs of Christmas, actually. I was hoping to see it published sometime in February, in honor of all those who hang onto their Christmas trees for much too long.

I have another one which I’m going to try and preserve in aspic till next year.

Note: be careful how you get rid of your Christmas tree! Don’t do like this guy: Man throws self out window along with Christmas tree

(I don’t know what color this is, but this is the color of one of mine! It comes in ten colors.)

You may have noticed the new “adverlita” in the sidebar! (You have to be on newyorkette.com to see the sidebar.) It’s for Chico Bag, which I have just discovered. Adverlitas, I hasten to remind you, are unsollicited “ads” for things I appreciate, such as Heifer International, Mulchfest, and Opera Mini. Things I like and use or ascribe to or practice.

I like the Chico Bag, and find myself using them (I store two in my regular handbag) all the time, mostly when I’m on my way home and decide to spontaneously drop in at my local supermarket. The thing I like about them is that I’m not tempted to sling them over my shoulder, which usually results in a very sore shoulder. These bags are very comfortable to hold in the hand, or slip over the arm in a very twee way as one gets one’s metro card out of one’s pocket. They don’t dig into your hand the way plastic bags do. I hate that feeling!

My stash of canvas bags, which rarely see the light of day — even the pretty Whole Foods one and the stylish Fairway one — are very jealous. Is it my fault they’re too bulky to carry around in case I might need them?

NB: the only thing you have to remember is to unpack them from their little attached carry-sack (which comes with a key chain attachment, that’s how small they are when packed), before you get to the cashier, so your bags are open and ready to receive your groceries as they come down the conveyor belt. I always forget and annoy my cashier with my nervous fumbling.

If nothing else, check out the funny plastic bag monster video on their site!

Very, very silly.

(Click on the image for more information!)

Today and tomorrow, in all of New York’s boroughs! Bring your tree to any of the locations in the list, and feel good about recycling your Christmas tree! You might even be able to take home the mulch for your own use, if you choose one of the “chipping” sites (as opposed to the “drop-off only” sites.

Happy Mulchfest!